White Fur

Story time.

I have been dying to tell EVERYONE I KNOW about this story. One of the creepiest moments of my life for sure.

Now I know you are all dying from the suspense. I am sure a few of you are crying and at least one of you are shouting at the computer "WHY OH WHY, CHELSEA, WILL YOU NOT TELL US THE STORY ALREADY?!" To actually tell the story though, I need to start with another story.

This week has been...intense, to say the least. Pretty much I have worked nonstop and really haven't had a break from either job. The busiest day was Wednesday. One of my clients had to have surgery, so I was to spend the day at the hospital with her. The previous day before this (that means Tuesday) everyone was just out of control and I even had to pull out the "mom voice." Lemme tell you about how terrifying my mom voice is. It is so scary that even I shut up after using it. I had to use it on my clients and no one talked for the rest of the night. So pretty much, I didn't sleep at all before surgery. So, with only a handful of sleep hours in me, I headed up to the hospital with the lady. She checked in, was wheeled away, and then I started freaking out. I think the reason why I was freaking out so much was

A: Dorothy has no family to help out whatsoever, so I kept on thinking about how horrible it would be to be all alone with horrible medical things like this

B: Surgery in general. Duh.

C: There was a freaking child in a cage that was being wheeled into the OR. It looked like it was part of a zoo exhibit and it was about to be tortured. That really screwed with me. I then went into anxiety mode and was thinking "I can never have kids" just because of the scrazy cage/gurney thing. Horrible.

So surgery took about two hours, then it was off to her room and nap and just chill with her while she was in recovery mode. Well, I spent a good 14 hours there with her and then I realized that there are seven other women that might need my attention. So I sadly left her at the hospital and went home to where "fun times" were happening.

Fortunately for me, fun times ended before I got there. Unfortunately, two other women were feeling extremely ill, so we made the trip to the ER. Grossest ER experience of my life. Near the end, there was a lady who was hacking up the nastiest sounds ever imagined. When I get tired and don't sleep well, I become nauseous. In fact, I am usually just nauseous all the time. It's just weird. Well, I was pale the whole time and then I almost lost it completely when one of the people accompanying the lady there shouted, "NO I DON'T WANT TO SEE BLOOD IN YOUR VOMIT RIGHT NOW." I quietly ran out of the ER and waited for the ladies to finish up.

Anyways, this week has just been eventful. That being said, I have been stressed like no other. I have not been eating well (crazy bread for any occasion is not the smartest idea I have had) and all my muscles are sore, sore, sore. So I went to visit my aunt and mother at the ADA convention...thing, and there were free foot massages at one of the booths. I was thinking, "Oh hey, my feet aren't too gross today. I might as well get one." Well, I get the creep in the wheelchair and my friend gets the gorgeous Tongan guy. So the poor guy is making me almost cry because he decides to massage my lower calves which are tighter than no other, and we try to have some convo about the essential oils that they were selling. So there I am, with my foot being rubbed and whatnot, and I am saying how I had no clue oils can help with any ailment. He then says this

"Yeah, they can help with muscle pain, clear up acne, and forgive me if this is too forward, can help with sexual mood and pleasure."

What. The. Hell.

Then he keeps on going about how wine and rose petals are great, but there are just some great smells and how he recommends this one called "White Fur" and is trying to find it for me to smell. Mind you, he is still touching my feet and it is on his thigh and whatnot and all I want to do is kick him away and run.

But I was too comfortable to leave, so I just waited until my time was over. However, I would not look him in the eye for the rest of the time.

Cheers.

Ch.Wa.